Top 10 Air Canada Super Elite Benefits

I recently achieved Air Canada’s Super Elite Status on account of being awesome.  Much to my surprise I learned there were some benefits I was not aware of.

Top 10 Air Canada Super Elite Status privileges you may not have heard about

  1. Not only are there no bike box fees, when you get to your destination your bike has better components on it and new bar tape.
  2. You no longer have to be a mile up to join the mile high club.  For flights up to 4 hours you only have to be 1000m up and for really short haul flights like from Victoria to Vancouver you can feel free to have sex in the isles during take off and landing
  3. You no longer have to get up to go the bathroom, the flight attendants will bring you a diaper.
  4. If you decide to use the lavatory the flight attendants are required to applaud upon your exit in celebration of what you just did in there.
  5. There is no jet lag when flying super elite.
  6. Chuck Norris has super elite status
  7. If you are flying to a foreign country, when you arrive you will be able to speak the language fluently
  8. You can try on the life jackets during the flight…..and inflate them
  9. Super Elite status has been scientifically proven to cause an increase in your spouses attraction to you.  Too bad you can’t benefit fully from it on account of always being on a plane.
  10. They start naming planes after you.

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  1. #10 should be number 1!!!

    And I’ve experienced #7….. I flew to Canada on air Canada once….when I landed i was able communicate with locals no problem……except for that jonny guy of course

  2. I knew they named an entire music genre after you, but I had no idea they started naming planes after you. About time, I say. Also, I’ve always wanted to know what it is like to inflate one of those things. Please tell…

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